HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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