we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
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Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
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I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize