I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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