Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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