doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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