Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
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