gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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