I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
