why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
