I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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