exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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