He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
