i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
