Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
He melted the stem
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week