FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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