I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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