You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
