Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
