Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
tell me about the eggs
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
