escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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