Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
there was a trapeze. enough said
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
