i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize