Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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