Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
