if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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