Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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