you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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