we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
