Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize