i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
