Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
there is glitter all over my balls
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
