if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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