If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
