I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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