Don't you send me to vm
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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