Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
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