Umm I'm too high to move.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
