oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
