Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm drive I can fine osifer
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
