so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Another day, another engagement, another cat
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
