did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I could have mohawked her pubes.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I pour the whiskey from now on
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
