He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
