You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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