Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
its liver damage thursday
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
