i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize