hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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