Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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