I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
