I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
