We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
BRING THE BAGELS
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
